Ho ho. What a pun eh?
Yesterday’s race was hyped up with “biblical rain” “remember last year’s mud fest?” “MY REAR MECH!”, I couldn’t face the ball ache of dragging a second pair of wheels around, especially as either pair is hardly special – budget shimano road and basic mavics that came with CAAD 10 3 years ago.
This would be the point in time where I point out I had a single speed cross biek, until I managed to knacker the front forks (carbon). I’m not sure how I knackered it. But it’s knackered. There’s a big scratch in it. I thought! I’ll buy a pompetamine, this will let me run discs! Then I’ve not got round to buying discs. Or disc wheels. However, I think I’ve solved the wheels problem (shout out to the Beckenham massive) and disc brakes will be purchased over the next month or three.
However, back to the massive biblically epic shit fest of mud I was supposed to be racing in last night. HOW WOULD I DO IT?
I decided to race single speed. ON THE MUM BIKE. ON THE FUCKING MUM BIKE.
This isn’t as shocking as you’d think, it’s a trek hybrid, it can take big tyres (Clement PDX (lovely tyres btw, such supple)) and it’s pretty RAD.
I got to Herne Hill last night and sat around listening to lots of chat about bikes, how the race at Bethlem/Addington etc shouldn’t really be called “London races” as they’re in “fucking Croydon”. They were from North of the river though. So, you know, FUCK THEM RIGHT?
We had half a lap through the technical stuff, I thought “ooh this is a bit slipppy”. And took some air out of the front and back.
I took so much out. When the whistle went and I went “full gas” (I didn’t, I don’t, I prefer the “try and catch as many people” rather than the “go flat out and try and hold on” strategy) I noticed a distinct problem. My front tube was fucking flat. Cue HILARIOUS cornering and a general sense of “where’s the fucking pit stop, I hope there’s a pump”.
Get to pit, this is before completing a lap, get 40 psi in the front, roll out. FUCKING HELL now the rear is all over the shop on the track transition. (OH HAI SPRINTERS, I IZ FUCKING UP YOUR CLEAN TRACK WITH MY DIRTY DIRTY MUD).
Cue one full lap back to the pits. Lots of grip in the mud though.
Back to the pits. 35 in the back.
I then spent the next 8 laps trying to catch up with as many people as I could. I saw Ved from my club about half a lap ahead and made it my goal to lap him, (soz Ved). I did.
Race was great, cornering is still not great, catching people, pulling stupid faces at the camera, nailing the “hill” everytime on a single speed purple shopper felt great.
3 weeks and then Cross proper starts.